December 1999

Naughty vs. Nice - Shouldn't Santa Love the Good and the Bad?

San Francisco, CA - It's the holidays and parents throughout the Bay Area are singing their children a familiar refrain: He knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake! Local psychoanalyst Mary C. Lamia, Ph.D., wants the singing about Santa Claus to stop.

"Making Santa into a critical figure who judges you is wrong," Dr. Lamia says. "When parents feel powerless to get their children to behave, they use external threats. It's very unfortunate for children that Santa is seen as a threat rather than the giving, magical figure he is intended to be."

Dr. Lamia warns that when a child is asked if he's been naughty or nice, it puts the child in a position to lie. "No kid is good all the time," she says. "At worst, Santa should expect children to try hard."

Most parents use Santa as a threat and then don't follow through, says Dr. Lamia. This sends a confusing message to the child. Dr. Lamia suggests that when children grow older and learn Santa's true identity, they actually have a healing experience. "Now the pressure is off and Santa is not looking over their shoulders anymore," she says.

To arrange an interview with Dr. Lamia, who chairs the San Francisco Psychoanalytic Institute's Public Information Committee, please contact Mary E. Tressel at 925-686-2958. Psychoanalysts are experienced mental health professionals, already possessing advanced degrees (MD's, PhD's or MSW's) who have undergone at least eight years of psychoanalytic training.